Friday 30 May 2008

thoughts on the creation of the Eidolon

Consider this;
If two lines intersect, at the point of intersection they produce a point i.e. the intersection of two one-dimensional objects creates an object of 0 dimensions – a point.

If two surfaces intersect, at the point of intersection they produce a line i.e. the intersection of two two-dimensional objects creates an object of 1 dimension – a line.

If two cubes intersect, at the point of intersection they produce a surface i.e. the intersection of two three-dimensional objects creates an object of 2 dimensions – a surface.

So if we take this one logical step further,
If two four-dimensional objects intersect, at the point of intersection they produce a three-dimensional object i.e. a three-dimensional object is produced when two four-dimensional objects intersect!

What if beings of four-dimensions exist and travel thru this four-dimensional world.

As one of these 4D beings moves through its world what happens?
It continuously creates a three-dimensional being!

So there was a “Garden of Eden”, beyond the realm of human perception- whose glory and beauty is totally unknowable to us. A garden of the fourth-dimension.

Perhaps a 4D being was indeed passing through this paradise for the first time, and it happened upon, or somehow became “conscious” of the 3D being that it was continuously creating as it strolled thru. This “awareness” resulted in the birth of consciousness in the lower 3D realm. Perhaps it is possible for 4Ds to pass thru without creating a 3D being or object at its point of intersection with the 4D world. Perhaps there is some mechanism or intent “Eve ate the apple...” that allows the 4D being to become aware of its 3D counterpart.

This 4D being looked thru to this lower realm and was delighted and drawn-in by all the new perceptions that were rushing at his newly-created 3D senses from the 3D world.

“Eve ate the app...and they became aware of their nakedness....”

Over a long period of time, the 4D becomes completely absorbed in the consciousness of the lower dimension, until finally it forgets its true nature and becomes totally identified with its consciousness in the 3D realm. Forgetting its true reality, it sees the 3D illusory realm as absolutely real.
“Adam and Eve were thrown out of the Garden of Eden……

Was this the “fall from grace” that is referred to in the Bible?
What if Genesis’ description of the creation of the world was in fact the creation of the “human being”; the dawning of consciousness of the 4D being in the 3D realm; the creation of the Eidolon.

American Philosophy and a new Perspective on ITLAD

In my work as a writer/philosopher, I use my own blog as a venue in which to publicly explore various aspects of politics, culture, and philosophy. I have recently posted a piece centered on Tony Peake and Karl L Le Marcs, and their theories as applied to a dilemma within American academia.

I thought some of the bloggers here might be interested in reading the piece, and remarking on it in the comments below:

Click here for my article entitled:

"On Quantum Theory, Afterlife and Consciousness: 2 British Midwives to our National Pregnancy"

Thursday 29 May 2008


I sent an article proposal to Psychologies Magazine about a week ago regarding ITLAD.

The reply got was that the editor feels the readers would find it too 'out there'!

What can I say? *stumped*

Wednesday 28 May 2008

Rebuttal to suicide

Osho on existence is a rebuttal to the previous post on suicide. To grow you've got to be here and to be here you've got to think life and yourself are wonderful. Suicide is the act of returning to daemonic reality and backing out of eidolon based reality. Should we condemn the suicidal as some religions do, for letting the team (the living) down? No because this is negative too. Life is reaching out in hope - death is collapsing back in despair (Letting go as opposed to fighting to hold on: Alice through the Looking Glass, and running on the spot to stay in the same place).

These things happen. Like disasters and accidents - the power to avoid things is not always there: Too tired to fight/ observe (stuck in daemon land/ feet not firmly planted on the ground).

I would have just added this as a comment but I'm having difficulty accessing this facility at the moment as well as getting on the blog in general (Technical difficulties with all things electronic at the moment - computer, DVD, Music Centre, scales - you name it!).

Tuesday 27 May 2008

Radio Interview - City Talk 105.9

Please note the change in date and time. City Talk wish to have more time discussing ITLAD and CTF so it will now be for about half an hour on Wednesday 4th June at 1400. They have also confirmed that listeners can phone in or email comments.

You may all be interested to know that I will be interviewed by Dean Sullivan on City Talk Radio 105.9 on Wednesday 4th June 2008 at 14:00 UK time (BST). I will be on-air for about 20 minutes. This can be listened to on 105.9 FM in the Merseyside area of the UK and for those of you spread across the globe this can, by the wonders of the internet, by listened to by logging onto the stations website

Many of you may recognise Dean Sullivan as the actor who played Jimmy Corkhill in the long-running 'soap' Brookside. Indeed Dean had the rather dubious 'honour' of closing the long-running series by having his character paint a change on the roadsign that featured in the opening credits. "Jimmy" added the letter 'd' at the end of "Brookside Close" to make it "Brookside Closed". As a long-term fan of the show this was, for me, a very sad ending to a brilliant TV series.

I think that this will be an interview well worth listening into. You may also have the opportunity to phone in whilst I am on air ... if this is the case then the number is ++ 44 (0)151 708 1059.

the last time they met-anita shreve

I read this book some years ago and it refuses to go out of my mind...
the book explores the mysteries of love, grief, longing and .....about lives lived in the past.....
Shreve masterfully plumbs the depths of loss and longing and love and the fictions we all keep in our heads that both save us and doom us as we go about the business of our lives!

Monday 26 May 2008

The Daemon in our Lives

We have talked extensively about the important role the daemon plays in our lives.

I believe the daemon is the guide that is part of our selves and also the connection to the universal consciousness.

So, the daemon is running the recording of previous runs. Its goal is to help us evolve to our full potential and reach our ultimate life.

This maybe the recognition of past mistakes, the need to learn something specific to move forward or maybe just going over old ground to appreciate the goodness of our lives and gain a greater insight and therefore learning, also an evolutionary step forward.

Q1) Is it possible for the daemon to make mistakes? As part of the collective can it get it’s ‘wires crossed’ leading us in a direction that’s not meant to happen? By being part of the universal consciousness, can the daemon get confused with the infinite ‘traffic’ within the egregore? Or would you say it’s our free will that leads us, metaphorically, ‘up the garden path’ and the daemon always has our best interests at heart? That the daemon tries, ultimately to do what is right by us, as it is us, even if it causes us immense pain and suffering?

Q2) Conversely, if the daemon does not make mistakes, in recognizing that a certain path is not the evolutionary step forward it wants us to make, can the daemon ‘cause’ obstacles to it’s eidolon to be removed to ensure the move forward is achieved. Even if the obstacle is another human being? Could a daemon interfere with the daemon of another's eidolon to meet the goals of it's own?

Free will still exists because the eidolon ultimately makes the choices but I wonder if the will of the daemon is such that it will do everything in its power to steer the eidolon in the right direction.

El Día de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) Celebrations - Mexico

This morning I received an email from a reader of ITLAD who lives in Iceland and is in the process of backpacking round Mexico. I was so interested in the implications of his observation that I have decided to post it for him. He writes:

"I spoke to you a while ago about your theory which I find fascinating. Anyway I am currently backpacking around Mexico and have been reading my copy of lonely planet religiously and noticed that when I was reading about the famous day of the dead celebration that occurs every November it seems to tie in very well with your theory. The festival stems from indigenous beliefs that when you die you relive your life in a parallel world but on this one day in November it is possible for the dead to return in spirit form to this world and they believe this festival eases their passage. You may already know about this but if you don't I thought you might find it interesting and maybe worth researching further. I am going to look into it further when I get back to Iceland. Any way best regards from a keen follower of your blog."

Ari, thank you very much for this. I for one was totally unaware of this parallel. I will be checking it up today. I am sure that we will receive some interesting comments. I look forward to any other obervations you may have.

Could it be that you are our first field-based itladian anthropologist - an itladian Margaret Mead perhaps?

An interesting observation

Recently I was reading a book on microscopy and came across a little poem which although applies to plants could well apply to man's multi-lives, if you will allow me to write it up here.
The poem written in 1727 by Henry Baker entitled 'The Universe' subtitled 'A Poem Intended to Restrain the Pride of Man'.

Each Seed includes a Plant: that Plant again,
Has other Seeds, with other Plants contain:
Those other Plants have all their Seeds; and Those,
More Plants, again, successively inclose.
Thus,every single Berry we find,
Has, really, in itself whole Forests of it's Kind.

And it concluded with the revelation of 'Reason's piercing Eye',
That Adam's loins must have contained 'his large Posterity, All people that have been,and all that e'er shall be.'

I thought what a wonderful poem which in a way has a parallel with our multy souls or lives.

Embarkation on a voyage of discovery

Well it's just over a week since I properly discovered ITLAD. A week of synchronicity (well more than a week really), mind stretching and dreaming. The book has been devoured (metaphorically) with space in between chapters to go to work! It feels like rediscovering an old friend with all the joy that brings.

Let me explain a bit about how I got here. I'll have to start somewhere, although it's all a chain and I could go back link by link to my birth (and before!). Never mind ... the easiest starting point is my holiday in India at the beginning of April. I was stunned, challenged and stimulated into thinking about things I'd left dormant. I was provoked by the whole idea of life as an illusion which repeats in a cycle of birth and rebirth for the simple purpose of living a better life. I witnessed a different way of life where people seemed to be less obsessed with material things - I suppose surviving was enough of a motivation. I came home determined to find out more about Hinduism and spirituality in general. It all seemed to reawaken my awareness of a bigger picture and a need to find out more.

Work has been busy - it always is after a holiday. I work with children and families in regards to mental health. The week after my holiday was memorable because for the first time I witnessed a child I knew quite well move into a psychotic episode. Psychosis is unusual in children. I had never come across it myself. This time I was very involved in trying to help a girl and her family manage a very frightening situation. I observed directly the way she was hyper-aware of stimuli and in her agitated bewilderment she seemed to be checking out everything with an internal voice who was telling her what to do. It was a fearful situation for her which left her totally incapacitated. She hadn't slept in days, refused to eat and was apparently afraid of water. I was at a loss how to help her but luckily the medics took over and I was spared that responsibility. She was given medication and became less obviously distressed. I cannot imagine what was happening for her "inside". I feel privileged to have met her at a stage before she was sedated.

The day after I saw her in hospital, I was looking on the intranet in a casual way. It's usually full of boring information but it also promotes events happening locally. I was struck by a talk that was going to be held that weekend at a local library. I have loved the Philip Pullman "His Dark Materials" trilogy. (In fact I read the whole of the Northern Lights book on a train journey to and from Durham!) So when I noticed that someone called Anthony Peake was due to be giving a lecture on the Science and Pholosophy behind the books, my interest was aroused. So began a process of checking on the internet (thank you Google) leading to watching the video clips on You Tube. The whole thing chimed with things I had read, studied and experienced throughout my life! At this point I knew I had to attend the talk. I was as excited as if I was going on a date!

Needless to say I was totally blown away by the ideas Anthony was introducing. (And he only mentioned Philip Pullman's work once in passing! I'll forgive him though... those ideas weren't as new to me as the way Anthony links things!)

Since then there have been other synchronicities, the main one relating to a dream I have had throughout my life. It goes like this:

I am aware of myself asleep in bed. I wake up (in my dream) with a start because I remember I have been given some very vital information (possibly by God) which has been entrusted to me so that I can make the whole world suffer less and be more safely protected. Only I can't remember what it is! I wake up (in reality) weeping and shaking, asking myself why should God give me of all people something so important when I can't rememember anything! Usually it takes me about 20 minutes to come out of the trance and the feeling leaves me deflated all day.

I had the dream again this week but this time I held out my hand to my daemon at the point when I usually get tearful. (In fact I must have done this really because it woke me up!) Instead of feeling a sense of failure, this time I was quite elated. I had a sense of "bring it on!"

Sunday 25 May 2008

a simple question....

Are we really free?

Servants of the Light (SOL)

On Friday evening I was honoured to present the opening lecture for the Servants Of The Light (SOL) 'Ritual With Purpose" weekend. Gary and Karl were also keen to attend so the three of us made our way over to the foothills of the Pennines in East Cheshire.

The theme of my talk was 'Space & Time' and I decided to focus on the subjective nature of time perception and to present evidence that precognition is a reality rather than a supposition.

The reception my presentation received was fantastic. Indeed we spent another hour not only discussing the implications of ITLAD and CTF but also receiving some amazing personal experiences from the audience, all of whom gave huge support to both theories. The majority of these focused in on the reality of the Daemon as a guiding force within human experience.

The subject then moved to synchronicity and one member of SOL was not only amazed at the series of coincidences that facilitated his attendance but also how many elements of itlad were being shown to be true by the work of The Federation of Damanhur in Italy - a place that he had been only a few days before. He strongly advised that direct contact should be made with this organisation (

As we discussed synchronicity my eye caught the front cover of the booklet outlining the weekend's events. I simply could not believe my eyes.

The image on the cover is the one at the start at the post. Remind you of anything?

Take a look at my posting of the 1st May 2008

Look at the image that I hypnogogically 'saw' whilst holding the Solar Cross.

Now is that not weird .... and clearly significant!!!
May I thank Dolores Ashcroft-Nowicki and Elizabeth Fox for again allowing me a platform to get across my ideas and theories. And thanks to Karl and Gary for not only attending with me but also for the great conversation and witty bantor in the car both on our way there and on our way back.
Thank you also to the attendees of the Ritual. You made me very welcome and I really enjoyed our chats afterwards. You are all also very welcome to join in with us here on our little part of the web. Any contributions, comments or questions will be more than welcome.

has anyone ever met themselves in a dream?

In the past I had many lucid dreams but now they are, sadly, very infrequent. I do recall, though, that in three of them I "met" myself.
On each occasion the other me was totally unresponsive and I would walk around him and stare at him and try to elicit a response.
I particulary remember one such dream in which the other me was sitting on a sofa in a meditating position and I was standing behind him, and I studied him for a long time, wondering why he wouldnt move or speak to me. Could this have been an attempt to communicate with my Daemon, or indeed he with me? And if so, why was it such a failure!

Saturday 24 May 2008

the voice of the Daemon?

About ten years ago I was near San Francisco having dinner with a lady friend at our favourite Indian restaurant. I was eating my favourite dish, Chicken vindaloo.
AS I was bringing the chicken to my mouth I was suddenly hit
by an overwhelming feeling of sufferring; I actually experienced the
suffering of all the chickens that died so that I could eat my favourite meal. It was so intense that I burst into tears and dropped my fork, unable to eat anymore. This feeling was to last for several minutes.
For the next two years I was a vegetarian until I became very ill. After one week of nightly stomach pains I admitted to myself that I should seek medical help. Just as I had this thought, a voice inside my head very very clearly said to me " eat chicken".
Of course I was astonished by this! On two counts;first because it was my experience of the suffering of animals that had made me become a vegetarian, and second because the voice was so clear, so real.
the next day I ate a little chcicken. That night I had my first nights sleep in a week. For the next three days I ate checken and each night slept well. I decided to experiement and did not eat cheicken the following day. That night the pains returned! SO, for the next week I ate chicken each day. My health and energy returned. Now I am no longer a vegetarian - its very confusing!!!

electromagnetic memory - my ideas

finally!!!!! I can access this blog from my location!!!

I have had a similar idea about memory , with a slight twist.
First an analogy. If two guitars are tuned exactly the same, then if a string is plucked on one guitar then the corresponding string vibrates on the other one.
My thought is this: if memory is stored as vibrations then there is no need for a "computer like" brain with complex algorithms to lookup memory. The stored memory simply vibrates with the input!
It is instananeous.
So our brain is not a super-computer, its more like a musical


Friday 23 May 2008

Pictures of the Mind

There’s a subject I’ve been trying to write about for days now but ironically I’m finding it hard to put into words – that subject is visual thinking. I once read some of the greatest minds in history were visual thinkers. It’s a hard point to argue against when one considers the evidence.

Autistic savant Daniel Tammet is a math genius like the world has never known. Tammet can perform the most complex mathematical equations in his head faster than an accountant with a calculator. He can also recall pi to 22,514 decimal places (it might interest the group that Tammet’s obsession with numbers began after suffering an epileptic seizure at age 3). Not surprisingly, Daniel doesn’t calculate numbers like the rest of us:

"When I multiply numbers together, I see two shapes. The image starts to change and evolve, and a third shape emerges. That's the answer. It's mental imagery. It's like maths without having to think."

Of course there are countless other examples of extraordinary people who could be defined as visual thinkers. And given the apparent strength of visual thinking, I wonder if it's a hardwired function of the brain or is it a skill which can be learned?

Sometime ago I came up with a mental exercise designed to improve my meditation skills. The exercise consists of eliminating words from my thought process and performing everyday tasks using only mental images. At first I experienced a great deal of difficulty and not an insignificant amount of physical pain. It felt as if my head had turned into a construction site as my brain learned to function under the new conditions. Eventually the task became easier but I have yet to master what I would consider true visual thinking. On a positive note though, I did sense an improvement in my ability to focus during meditation.

So I have to ask if anyone here is a visual thinker, or possibly knows someone who is. Given the amazing minds assembled I would venture to guess there are more than a few here. I for one would be most interested in hearing your thoughts and experiences on this subject.

References: A genius explains: The Daniel Tammet Story

Thursday 22 May 2008

The Overview Effect: Enlightenment Made Easy

So you want to experience enlightenment, eh? Forget all the meditation, hours of chanting and animal free diets. Turns out all you have to do is become an astronaut. In a fascinating article at the this week, Apollo 14 astronaut Edgar Mitchell discusses his mind altering experiences in space. Apparently the phenomenon is quite common among space travelers and has even been given a name: the Overview Effect. Mitchell briefly touches on his ideas about the how and why of his ordeal including some comments about consciousness and quantum mechanics. Something tells me he might actually be one of us. ;-)

The Lake House

I just caught the ITLAD genre film 'The Lake House' on HBO. Although it doesn't speak directly to ITLAD, it does a very nice job with some of the related themes - especially that of time. It received only mixed reviews when released 2 years ago but I suspect many here would find it quite enjoyable.

“[The Lake House] was written by David Auburn, directed by Alejandro Agresti, and stars Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock as Alex Wyler and Kate Forster, respectively an architect living in 2004 and a doctor living in 2006. The two are introduced and share correspondence across the years by leaving letters in a mailbox at the lake house they've both lived in at separate points in time.” Wikipedia link

Wednesday 21 May 2008

"The Gospel of the Second Coming" by Timothy Freke & Peter Gandy

Many years ago, when I had finished the first version of ITLAD I was not sure what I should do. I knew that one needed to secure the services of a literary agent but which one. I had heard that this was harder than getting a publishing deal so I was at a loss.

Whilst on holiday in Stoupa (a beautiful small resort on the Greek Peloponnese) I read an amazing book called The Jesus Mysteries by Timothy Freke and Peter Gandy. I was really excited to discover that Freke & Gandy also discuss the Daemon and Eidolon as I had done in my book. On my return to the UK I checked out their website and fired an email of to Tim. I never expected a reply. What I received was that and more. Tim was so fascinated by my 'take' on this Gnostic belief that he suggested that I contact his literary agent. This I did and, as we like to say, the rest is history.
Tim and Peter have brought out another couple of books since Mysteries including the amazing Laughing Jesus. However it is their latest book - The Gospel of the Second Coming that is well worth reading. Not only that but it is rib achingly funny!
In this book may I draw particular attention to Chapter 10 (page 81) which has a most interesting discussion regarding the Daemon and the Eidolon.
If you are interested Tim and Peter have a website dealing with this classic book - check it out at

I know that Tim is aware of our little blog here ... and I will give him the "heads-up" that I have referenced his great book.

Tuesday 20 May 2008

Opening paragraphs of original 2001 "Cheating THe Ferryman"

For one of those Gnostics
the visible universe was an illusion
or (more precisely) a sophism.
Mirrors and fatherhood are abominable
because they multiply and disseminate the universe.

Jorge Luis Borges
(from: Tlön, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius”).

In 1988 I purchased a book entitled “Labyrinths” written by the Argentinean poet and philosopher Jorge Luis Borges. I had come across one or two of his stories in anthologies of fantastic literature and his style and content so intrigued me that I wished to read more. I quickly discovered that although I enjoyed the strange worlds that he created I simply did not fully understand what he was about. At least once a year I took the book from my bookshelves and took a different story as a starting point. However in the way that certain books can, I found myself admiring the style rather than the content. In this way the book was to remain not fully read and not even vaguely understood, a silent testament to the success of ignorance over pretension.

Twelve years later I began research into the book you now have in your hands. Many dinner parties and frustrating pub discussions had lead me to believe that the only way that my curious cosmological theories could be understood would be if I wrote them down. For years I had watched as inquisitors, initially fascinated, became more and more puzzled by my esoteric ramblings. In a curious vindication of the overall theory I had come by my beliefs through introspection rather than research. Like Schliemann and Troy I knew that my intuitions were correct but I could back them up with no empirical evidence. However as I began my quest I discovered that every book I picked up at random from my personal library gave me the support I needed. I discovered that my ideas had not spontaneously occurred but had come together in a very deeply subliminal way. My ‘facts’ had been quietly marshalling themselves within my subconscious so that when I came to look for support my book collection became my personal Hill of Hissarlik. All the books that I had, as far as I could understand at the time, bought and read at random, showed a pattern. Gems of supportive information fell from the pages with no search needed from myself. “Cheating The Ferryman” was not being researched; it was being excavated. It lay just below the surface of my conscious mind waiting to be uncovered.

Joy within ITLADian theory

[Written in the interests of balance, and as a counter-contemplation to the excellent previous post by Hurlyburly]

How has Tony’s book and this blog brought Joy to your lives, or made you see things in a more positive light?

I’ll post my own thoughts in the comments to save blog space, and welcome ALL to share your stories and thoughts.

A Dark Philosopher
Karl L Le Marcs

Suicide within ITLADian theory

Well it's been over 4 years since i was studying one of the great founding fathers of Sociology, this of course being the wonderful Emile Durkheim who gave such a marvelous contribution to all of Sociological theory but in particular to the study of Suicide.

For all of you who perhaps aren't aware of his work, maybe this would be a good time for some Wikipedia!

So taking all of these things into account, what are the implications of this for Tony's theory? (excuse the fact that some of these questions are the same dressed differently! It's simply me trying to encourage lots of questioning in this area!)

Is Suicide a discourse for certain individuals or is it a Sin?(I don't necessarily mean in a religious context)

What would the Daemon's influence be in such an outcome? - Is it possible this decision could be encouraged? Surely there are recorded stories of voices persuading the individual to choose both paths, but not necessarily from the Daemon.

Would there still be a life review played back in real time?

Would an outcome of suicide indicate a weak Daemonic influence or merely a necessary chain of events?

If we are all making subtle changes each time striving for the perfect life/frequency is it likely that a particular individual committing suicide could ever be the desired ending (for them in their reality)?

Is Suicide an indication that an individual simply has a lot of growing and evolving to experience in order to achieve a healthier life path?

That should get the ball rolling!? You get the point right? Suicide, how does this change things at all?

Monday 19 May 2008

IONS "Shift In Action"

On the 2nd of May 2008 I placed a blog entry onto the Institute of Noetic Sciences (IONS) 'Shift In Action site. This has therefore been on the site nearly three weeks. This is one of a few I have placed on this site over the last couple of months. However this particular blog has proven amazingly popular. I have been watching with amazement as the number of 'reads' have became greater and greater. However in the last two days it has gone crazy. Now either there is something wrong with their counting system or my contribution has, within less than 20 days, been the most read blog entry in the history of this site (5,715 reads!). I have done a quick review back to the start of the site in February 2005 and I cannot find one contribution that has generated as much interest. It must be an error ... but if it is not this really shows how itlad and CTF are now starting to make a real impact!

And maybe even give it a read to increase the numbers even more!

is there life after death

Sunday 18 May 2008

Where Is The Internet? (An Analogy)

[A continuation (and attempted clarification) of the original thought-process from my previous post The 'Sensation' Of Being Stared At and my “Collapsing The Consciousness Wave” theory within, incorporating ITLAD and CTF]

We all use it; we all think we know what it is; but where is the Internet?

This blog for instance: All of us merrily skip here to frolic in the cerebral carnival of consciousness, but where is it; where do we go to get here?

Now, consider Wi-Fi (Wireless Fidelity), which allows us to connect to the Internet wirelessly. The Internet is a waveform, all around us, and if we have a Laptop or a PC that is Wi-Fi enabled then our computer can collapse the waveform of the Internet and produce a particle of the Internet within our system.

Within this particle of the Internet that is your computer, you store memories (downloaded content), experiences (website history) and personality (bookmarks of favourite sites) which you can access and revisit every time you use it.

So, in effect, our computer collapses the waveform of the Internet and creates a particle of the Internet within it, which is then subjective and useable by us to store our memories, experiences and personality. Then, by using email and chat facilities, we can form Quantum Entanglements with other computers, other particles of the Internet, and these entanglements interact on the objective wave of the Internet, which is everywhere.

Therefore, I posit this as analogous to how Consciousness works within my theory:

"We are all of one consciousness," (the Internet wave)
"but experiencing itself subjectively," (Internet on our computers)
"as collapsed particles of consciousness," (our computer)
"from the objective consciousness field waveform." (the Internet)

Our Daemon in this example is therefore our Cache (that part of our computer that stores previous web-pages for faster access) so when we revisit sites we have prior knowledge of previous experiences.

Can I ask my fellow ITLADists -

Do you think my Internet/Wi-Fi/Computer analogy helps explain my “Collapsing The Consciousness Wave” theory in more accessible and personably understandable language?

A Dark Philosopher
Karl L Le Marcs

some more on osho!

You are not accidental. Existence needs you. Without you something will be missing in existence and nobody can replace it. Thats what gives you dignity, that the whole existence will miss you. The stars and sun and moon, the trees and birds and earth - everything in the universe will feel a small place is vacant which cannot be filled by anybody except you. This gives you a tremendous joy, a fulfillment that you are related to existence, and existence cares for you. Once you are clean and clear, you can see tremendous love falling on you from all dimensions.
By: Osho

In the East people have condemned the body, condemned matter, called matter "illusory," maya - it does not really exist, it only appears to exist; it is made of the same stuff as dreams are made of. They denied the world, and that is the reason for the East remaining poor, sick, in starvation. Half of humanity has been accepting the inner world but denying the outer world. The other half of humanity has been accepting the material world and denying the inner world. Both are half, and no man who is half can be contented. You have to be whole: rich in the body, rich in science; rich in meditation, rich in consciousness. Only a whole person is a holy person, according to me. I want Zorba and Buddha to meet together. Zorba alone is hollow. His dance has not an eternal significance, it is momentary pleasure. Soon he will be tired of it. Unless you have inexhaustible sources, available to you from the cosmos itself...unless you become existential, you cannot become whole. This is my contribution to humanity: the whole person.
By: Osho

"And therefore, as a stranger, give it welcome" : A Peakian transformation of Hamlet

This post is far removed from scientific theorizing; it sprang from a tendency in me toward literary criticism, but it's subject is very much related to Tony's eidolon/daemon dyad, and hopefully can at least facilitate discussion.

It has been a source of my profound and overwhelming gratitude to Tony, that his eidolon/daemon dyad theory has - at least for me - cast a new light on all, illuminating in all directions: "everything is new, and yielding!". . .

I do not know if any fellow-bloggers are as fond of the play, Hamlet, as am I, but I have noticed as of late that it now seems brimming with eidolon/daemon references. Even the meeting with the ghost now strikes me as Hamlet in inner dialogue with his daemon. The brilliant and classic critiques and commentary by Earnest Jones and Theodore Reik were Oedipal in their focus and brought much insight and pleasure; however, viewing through Tony's lens has increased such, very much so, for me.
I have now found a pattern - a subtext - in the play, which had before escaped me, in which I see for the first time Hamlet struggling with a second self (i.e., daemonic influence, take over). Certain of his cryptic lines are now both more poignant and more revealing.

To list a few, in no particular oder (as they come from memory; I have written/presented on this play so often I feel that I can trust myself well in this regard) - The following are all from Hamlet's own mouth: [spoken by H. to the ghost] "I will follow thee, call thee Hamlet."; "Hamlet from himself be taken away"; "Hamlet does it not; Hamlet denies it"; "Hamlet [though he act]is yet of the faction wronged"; "I have that within which passeth show [surpasses his own appearance]; "shall I couple hell?" [join with an alien force]; "the body is with the king, but the king be not with the body" [i.e., the eidolon is with the daemon, yet the latter is detached and autonomous]; "he was my dying voice; the rest is silence"[of the daemon territory]. . .
There is as well visible to me for the first time a trajectory of progress, a sense not of Hamlet's madness - feigned or actual - but of a subordination to his higher self which he initially fights but finds increasingly seductive (" 'tis now the very witching time of night[daemon time]. . now I could do such bitter business as the day would quake to look upon[eidolon does not comprehend the daemon's quest]"). The dialectical process, initiated by the daemon, followed furtively by the eidolon, is revealed.
I cannot describe the way in which Tony's concept has altered this play - a life long treasure of my soul - to the point where I feel it has been rendered fully whole , at last: To my thinking, this is no small feat. The shadow of the Bard touched by Tony's concept: alchemy across the centuries! How odd, but somehow beautiful. How can I not be grateful for such transubstantiation? This is magic to a literary soul. That it was unintentional, unknown by the agent! All the more potent for its action at a distance (and spooky as well). In any case, such windfalls are few and far between.
Moreover, even Tony's theme which runs throughout ITLAD regarding TLE/schizophrenic onset is quite evident now: Hamlet speaks of "time" being somehow "set out of joint", and something has altered his thinking, "by my fare, I cannot reason"; he makes claims of perception and process both being "askew"; that he feels odd, a stranger in his own court and land, and "my imagination's all afoul." His odd comments to Horatio upon the castle platform (Horatio hears the bell strike quite loudly the hour; Hamlet's response: "Indeed, I heard it not" ) become clear: He has crossed the border, he is already, as Peake says, "falling out of time". Obviously all issues from the playwright himself, and Shakespeare at age 36 was clearly experiencing something uncanny and disturbing. A biographical study confirms this.
An interesting aside, perhaps also daemonic in its origin: Reik himself speaks of the age of about 36-38 (Ortega y Gasset places it at 26, but I think that is far from correct)as being one of profound import for the superior man, of a rising of "the man within the man"; Freud speaks of a second such movement, from about 50-53, with a point of extreme danger requiring survival at the age of 51-2 (my own husband fell just at this point). . . In any case, while I am fully aware that not all are obsessive Hamlet fans as I have been since age 28, I do think the parallels to be found within the play to Tony's dyad are profound; and hopefully this will counterbalance and compensate for the importunity of going on at such length regarding my literary passion (or perhaps not). But I will let is stand: Surely it is proper and fitting to express gratitude to Tony, for that which seems akin to the miraculous.

Saturday 17 May 2008

Glutamate - the REAL link between Autism, Epilepsy and Psychosis??

Hi.... having fought my way through the last 3 or 4 posts and their 100's of comments my brain needs to cool off a little and so I thought I'd bring things back down with a bump and create a heap of controversy (this blog doesn't have much of that does it, ha ha).

Hypothesis.... "Glutamate is the trigger for stereotypical autistic behaviour, seizures and also schizophrenia."

Some out there may already know this. Let me know if you do. No-one who talks to us about our son has ever accepted any of these links and they treat him for 3 separate conditions. So how have I been brought to this belief?

Well, it is really a combination of years of trying to understand my son's conditions and some fascinating observations of my son in the past 2 weeks. If we are right, or even on the right path, the effect could be shattering for him and maybe many others.

But without ITLAD and this blog I would have continued to miss the critical ingredient which is the power and enormity of the unconscious mind and the Daemon.

We have known for 20 years that the chemical, MSG (Mono-Sodium Glutamate, E621), which is added as a flavouring in many many foods, causes our son to climb walls, babble, change personality, get angry and hyperactive. As a child, such behaviour was partially controlled by removing MSG from his diet. Nobody took us seriously that he had a condition or even that MSG could do this. They effectively patronised us. But we persisted. At 18 years old, after 14 years of trying, we eventually got someone to accept that he may have an Autistic Spectrum Disorder. But again, nobody cared to connect it to anything he ate or any predisposition to chemicals in the brain.

However, we started to read about it and there was a school of thought that Gluten may have a connection. Some reported success by cutting it out of the diet. But no-one could say why this worked, as Gluten was not really linked to brain issues per se, it just tended to be see as an issue to do with digestion and skin issues. And besides... nobody knows how the brain works, do they!? (But that still doesn't stop doctors from cramming drugs into us to help with problems of the head!)

Anyway, at 20, he had 2 big seizures for the first time, a month apart. Medics quickly treated it as epilepsy and gave him anti-seizure drugs. 3 months later, we saw the start of serious psychotic episodes of anger, paranoia, anxiety and hallucinations. Nobody knew what it was or why. No-one accepted any link to the seizures or the drugs. We could not find anyone who would even consider the possibility.

18 months ago, the psychosis was present every day, many times a day and unpredictably severe. It was a terrifying time for the family. For months, we refused to medicate, but we gave in eventually as it was becoming dangerous for him and for us. For 12 months he has been on anti-seizure and anti-psychosis drugs. The seizures seemed to be in control but the psychosis would still rear its head every few days without any obvious trigger. The Psychiatrist was surprised but agreed not to further increase the dose.

2 weeks ago, he had his first grand mal for over 2 years (See my earlier post on this). No-one can tell us why this would happen after so long. We just get sympathy and the medics wanting to increase his dose (over my dead body). Last week, he started having daily episodes of 'Mr Hyde' behaviour again. All the old hallucinations coming back and the anger etc.

We looked for what had changed in the last couple of weeks.

Just one thing came to mind.... Weetabix... he had started to eat Weetabix, by the bucket load. That's when it came to me... the old wives' tale that a Gluten free diet sometimes helped Autistic people. But is there a connection?

Well, guess what... Wheat Gluten is the modern source for producing MSG!!


1. The link to seizures and psychosis.
If some reports are true that, at the times when Glutamate 'floods' the brain, one has vivid hallucinations of one's past life, then perhaps what Glutamate is doing is 'opening the doors' of the unconscious mind and allowing it to leak into the conscious field. For some who are more predisposed, this 'leakage' is probably more of a tidal wave that overwhelms the brain and can, at worst, trigger a major seizure. At the least, it could trigger illusions, visions and voices composed in any combination from the past. It would not be unreasonable to expect such a sufferer to become very frightened, even angry or aggressive and certainly could appear psychotic if still awake! (And a thought on why people get the shakes during a seizure.... perhaps it is because the daemon/unconscious mind finds itself 'in charge' while the eidolon is out for the count... and it is nor very practiced at mundane tasks like managing a human body!)

2. Now the link to Autism
Many of you will have a view that someone with autism has difficulty relating to the 'real world' and will often hide away from it and avoid contact with people. If they are living in their 'right brain', it is no surprise - what goes on in the real world would be far from what goes on in the unconscious mind.


I must research more into the chemicals that could trigger the 'letting in' of the unconscious mind. It may not just be glutamate. Indeed, there is no obvious reason why it has to be the same for everyone. However, I am tempted to believe that the treatment for all 3 conditions may be the same and quite different from the traditional, subjective medications which are accepted by many as really quite hit and miss. The suppression of Dopamine may well be the right treatement for some conditions, but is this deliberate 'flattening of the personality' right for those with Autism? Perhaps all they need is an acceptance that the human mind is made up of 2 minds, one of which is connected to the universe, the other is connected to this human world and when one gets into the other at the wring time, the only possible result can be chaos..

Sorry for keeping you all up late... But I'd be really intersted to hear what yuo all there merit in this? Is it total rubbish? Do you know of anyone who is doing related research?


PS - If controlling the amount of Glutamate in one's head can help manage the overactive 'positive' side of someone's character, then maybe we should recommend daily Weetabix as a cure for people who need a bit more personality in their lives!

Some Quotes From Osho....

“Everybody is going to pass through the gates someday. If you can remember that you are only pure consciousness – not the body, not the mind, not the heart, not your money, not your prestige, not your power, not your house, but pure consciousness – then you can pass through the barrier of death unscratched... Death has power over you only if you are attached. Freedom from attachment makes you capable of entering into the universal light and becoming one with it, and that is the greatest blessing, the ultimate ecstasy beyond which nothing exists. You have come home.”-OSHO

Death is not the end of life; in fact, it is a completion of one life, the crescendo of one life, the climax, the finale.And once you know your life and its process, then you understand what death is. – Osho

“Life and death are reality there is no such thing as death – life is eternal.”

Virgin Life - Deja Vu

Oh goodie it's another Virgin life post! Was just wondering if there has been any research into Virgin Lifers that do claim to have Deja vu and other Daemon based phenomenon? Is that a complete contradiction because if it is i think it's a dangerous problem. I agree with a fair majority of Tony's theory but have several issues with this Virgin Life concept that i probably couldn't do justice by attempting to explain.

Surely it can't be as simple as if you claim to have had Deja Vu than you are not a Virgin Lifer!

Simple CTF Question

Are the subsequent lives in ITLAD theory experienced in the same flesh and blood manner as the virgin life or are they played out only within our consciousness, like in a dream. From my understanding I would say the latter; however I suspect the panel would say this is incorrect.

Friday 16 May 2008

Crystal (Eye) Ball – ‘See’ The Future ?

[Warning: Don't stare at the image too long as you will start to bend your own perception and most likely feel somewhat unwell]
Unfortunately, (or not, depending on your perspective), I don’t have time to compose a full post on this very interesting development in ongoing research into perception, and my many previous posts and comments regarding the temporal time delay between empirical experience and what is presented to active consciousness (Daemon to Eidolon communication), so I shall give you a link to an online report published today and an optical illusion to illustrate the findings.

Catching a football; manoeuvring through a room full of people; jumping out of the way when a golfer yells “fore”. Most would agree these seemingly simple actions require us to perceive and quickly respond to a situation. Assistant Professor of Cognitive Science at Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute Mark Changizi argues they require something more — our ability to foresee the future.

Crystal (Eye) Ball: Visual System Equipped With 'Future Seeing Powers'
Link to online report - "Perceiving The Present"

A Dark Philosopher
Karl L Le Marcs

The Electric Universe

A few months back I stumbled upon the works of David Talbott, an American comparative mythologist and author. Talbott contends the universe operates more by the forces of electricity than the “gravity-driven universe of prior theory.” And though much of Talbott’s Velikovsky inspired work is controversial at best, it did introduce me to the more solid (though obscure) science of plasma cosmology.

I won’t attempt to delve too deeply into this fascinating subject for fear of not doing it justice. What I will say is it completely changed my way of thinking. If you are unfamiliar with plasma cosmology I highly recommend you take the time to do some research. It sets forth the canvas from which many of the ideas discussed on this blog spring forth. A great primer on this subject can be found at the below listed web site:

"Mainstream science, for the most part, looks on the universe as electrically neutral and purely mechanical; a place where the weak force of gravity holds fort. Plasma Cosmology, by contrast, acknowledges the electrodynamic nature of the universe. Gravity and inertia are NOT the only forces at work."

Electromagnetic Waves of Memory

To my knowledge the precise mechanics of memory storage has yet to be discovered, though conventional thinking places it in quasi digital format somewhere within the brain (much like the hard drive on your computer). I would argue this would be an inefficient method of data storage and prefer to take an analog approach in terms of waveform modulation and resonant oscillators.

I propose that memory is actually stored as a modulated electromagnetic wave similar to the radio signal received by your car radio. If we look at the brain as a memory converter rather than storage device then we begin to build the foundations of an extremely efficient analog computer.

I believe each one of us oscillates at a distinct central frequency determined at conception. This frequency becomes the carrier which we use to store our memories. When neurons fire in the brain a modulated electromagnetic wave (at our personal carrier frequency) is generated and propagated into the atmosphere. Individual neurons would act as bandwidth filters, each one tuned to a distinct frequency.

As we stroll thru life the inputs from our five senses are converted to an electromagnetic wave by their respective neurons and create a complex modulated analog signal. This signal becomes the film of our Bohemian IMAX and records everything we ever experience. Along with sensory input, we can also record our thoughts, emotions and certain other indiscernible inputs. And by its very nature this signal carries a built in time stamp for later memory retrieval.

Certainly the electromagnetic carrier wave we produce would not be lost. Because our bodies are a mass of electrical currents it stands to reason we carry with us our own magnetic field. This field would create a resonant oscillator at our own personal frequency. This oscillator would act as the bucket in which we stored our ‘memory waves.’ The model for this concept can be seen in Earth’s own Schumann resonances and the transmission of VLF radio signals around the globe.

The method of memory retrieval would be quite simple really. Suppose we encounter a red hot burner on the stove. We throw this visual image into our electromagnetic memory bank… and then we listen. Basic wave theory states if the signal comes back amplified then it had to be added to an existing waveform (a memory). If it is returned dampened then it has not found a match is only recorded. Once a past memory is found we can demodulate all the additional information stored on the carrier wave. There we might find heat, pain, certain smells and emotions. We now have a complete recollection of a certain image, one which has been reinforced (amplified) by our new current view.

So that’s my electronics technician view of the mind. I’m sure it’s not exact but I think it sets up a nice direction going forward. For me it helps explain certain other phenomenon such as ESP and telepathy. It seems if we were able to tune ourselves to someone else’s frequency then we could easily demodulate their thoughts (quite common among long time couples, which I feel is a direct result of entrainment). It also helps explain the Akashic record and our access to it. Our thoughts are not just our own but are also modulated with the Earth’s own resonant frequency. Not only do I have access to my own personal memories but also to all the memories of those who have come before.

Dr. Alan Roberts on Deja Vu

Dr. Alan Roberts has placed a series of his lectures on YouTube. Dr. Roberts is involved with an organisation called ISHVAL - the Institute For The Study Of Hierological Values). ISHVAL was founded in 1966 by the philosopher Eugene Halliday. This organisation continues to keep alive the life-work of this fascinating thinker.

A few weeks ago Alan did a presentation in which he examines Halliday's philosophy on deja vu in the light of my theories. This is a fascinating lecture and I suggest that if you have the time please do check it out. It can be found at

I am deeply honoured that others are now applying itladian philosophy to their own ideas on the nature of reality. Indeed to have my ideas discussed in the same lecture as Eugene Halliday's is honour indeed.

Thank you Alan.

Response to posting "Slow Death Experience"

Thanks RAC for a very interesting posting with regard to what is experienced by the conscious mind in the last few seconds of life. In response to this I would like to post an unpublished section of the original version of ITLAD when it was still plain old Cheating The Ferryman. In this I wrote the following:

'Bhagawhandi was dying. That was obvious to all who knew her. The doctors had diagnosed a malignant brain tumour, an astrocytoma, which was impossible to remove. She was only nineteen years old. What surprised everybody was how remarkably cheerful she was, accepting totally that she had but a short time to live. The tumour was growing larger day by day and was inching forward towards her temporal lobe. Up until this stage she had suffered the occasional seizures but nothing particularly debilitating. However as soon as pressure was placed upon her temporal lobe her seizures became more frequent – and stranger.

In the early stages of her illness the seizures had been grand mal convulsions but her new ones were altogether of a different nature. She would not lose consciousness, but would drift into an epileptic – like dream-state, similar to that described by Hughlings Jackson. She began to experience the classic ‘reminiscence’ as described in chapter 4.

However this dream-state soon developed into something far stronger. Bhagawhandi began to have very realistic hallucinations about being back in India, and not just India but the India of her childhood. In these semi-waking states she actually found herself back on the dusty streets of her old village, interacting with people and circumstances long disappeared in the mists of time. She would find herself listening to a speech being made in the village square. On one occasion she was in a church, in another in a graveyard. She claimed that she was actually re-living these memories as actual events.

As Bhagawhandi’s present life began to ebb away she began to live more and more in her new world created from her own past. The visions ceased being occasional and began to take up most of her waking hours. She lay, her young face rapt in attention to a world inside her own mind, with a faint, mysterious smile on her face. What was happening had a profound effect upon the nursing staff around her. All accepted that something very strange, but very wonderful was taking place. Nobody disturbed her allowing her her dreams.

The psychiatrist responsible for her was also fascinated. He felt awkward but was keen to know exactly what was taking place. He asked her quietly “Bhagawhandi, what is happening?”

“I am dying”, she answered, “I am going home. I am going back where I came from-you might call it my return.”

During the next week she disappeared totally into the world of her memories. She ceased responding to all external stimuli but lay with the same faint smile on her face. Three days later she quietly slipped away, returning permanently to her own past. And in this way she died, as the psychiatrist poetically described it “or should we say, arrived, having completed her passage to India”.

At first sight this case, so described in Oliver Sacks’ wonderful book The Man Who Mistook His Wife For a Hat, seems to have many similarities with the discoveries of Wilder Penfield described in an earlier chapter. Indeed Sacks and his associates came to the same initial conclusion. However on reflection this was seen as a far more complex phenomenon. The Penfield memories were very similar to tape recordings in that if interrupted they would, if started again, go through the memorised event again. For Bhagawhandi the hallucinations were much wider in terms of their structure. To extend the analogy of videotape it seems that Penfield’s patients accessed their memories via a videocassette recording. The recall was presented in a rigidly linear format with no options on random access. Bhagawhandi’s memories on the other hand seemed to be recorded upon a format such as a DVD. Not only was random access available but also differing viewpoints and sound effects could be selected. This three-dimensional memory recall is exactly how Karl Pribram believes memory, and perception to work. Sacks’ tragic young patient was re-accessing her memories as recorded in the holographic-like processes suggested by Pribram and Bohm.

Could it be that what was taking place in the mind of the young Indian girl is an actual normal part of the death process? Could this be the explanation why the brain seems to record every event of a person’s life…to begin a ‘sensearound’ re-run of the whole show as we approach the final curtain?'

Is it possible that this, together with the sensing of the presence of the "Being of Light" (hence the eyes of the dying person following something else in the room that is invisible to the observers as pointed out by ROBIN) in its role as a calming influence?
Of course I suggest that the "Being of Light" is simply the Daemon projecting itself, as an hallucination, into the visual field of the dying Eidolon.

For any of you interested I am having my webmaster re-design my website. This will include an additional page were prevously unavailable itladian material will be available for purchase. One of these will be a pdf of the whole original, unedited, unexpurgated, 'hard-science' version of ITLAD of which the above is a section.

Thursday 15 May 2008

A Thought About The Virgin Life

Want to throw something I've been mulling over all day into this fine mix of minds!

Q. Could there be only ONE virgin life from which every eventuality stems from?

One particle of consciousness on the objective consciousness field from which bursts forth every conceivable outcome at the point of death? The Bohmian IMAX is therefore not a return but a continuation? It also seems more ‘efficient’, there isn’t trillions of VL’s creating numerous returns but one VL creating all the eventualities? If it all comes back to one VL, then precog, déjà vu etc stems from the same trunk from which all the branches grow? This also puts me in mind of the Big Bang Theory.

Slow Death Experience

When my Father was dying of cancer, Hope Hospice left a pamphlet informing the reader of what to expect as the end drew near. Reading this pamphlet I found myself fascinated by how the human body prepares itself for death. More interesting however was how the psyche prepared for this “final” transition.

The pamphlet stated that many people will talk about a pending journey; an experience my Father had right before he left us. I wasn’t there for the final days but my Mother said he spoke of packing his belongings and going to the train station for his departure. There were also other strange conversations with “imaginary” people and odd tales he would relate back in his final hours.

What I learned from all of this is how much dying is as important and as beautiful a part of our life as the living is. Life has created a well defined reaction mechanism to the termination of our time on Earth; a process I feel could not have possibly been influence by natural selection.

My question to the blog is what kind of experiences (if any) have you had relating to this phenomenon? I also wonder how it all fits in with the primary topic of CTF. What do you feel are the mechanisms and forces at play here as it relates to ITLAD?

Wednesday 14 May 2008

What once seemed just a wall, is now a door...

Harking back to today's conservatory meeting with Tony, and the astonishing music track incident to which he refers in the previous post, I want to mention some other thoughts the warm afternoon helped inspire.

As we marvelled at the growing interest around the globe, I commented how Tony's book seems to be opening up a whole new pespective on 'what' and 'who' we are, creating a novel entry point or doorway (Kaballah?? - re: the book on your table today, Tony), through which we can try to find answers to the nature of our existence. Tony's conclusions in his book may be right or may be wrong, but it seems now, to me, to have become somewhat of a detail, because 'pre-ITLAD', my theories (and academic interest) about myself and those around me were limited to films and what I read in 'The Secret'. How far I have journeyed in such a short time... and such a long way to go!

Thanks Tony... the real purpose of your work may still be a mystery to you and others, but I now know that it is a key part of imminent changes in collective consciousness. Your role is clear... you must continue to explore, facilitate and write. You must follow where your subconscience leads you and not worry that the mission may still be unclear. All will surely be revealed in due course.


Weirdly Symbolic Synchronicity

Ed "ItsCoolToCare" has just left. He popped over to see me to discuss the implications of his son's Daemonic Encounter mentioned in his posting of the 13th May:

We were sitting in the conservatory soaking in the beautiful late spring sunshine and I had my ARCHOS mp3 machine playing in the background. Now you will recall my story with regard to the random play element of this machine and how it saved my life on the motorway. (as described:

Now this is a newer version of the same machine but it works in the same way. I had it on random play - a reminder, nearly 16,000 mp3's on this machine so a 1 in 16,000 chance of any one track being randomly selected.

Ed and I start discussing the nature of reality and how it can be seen as analogous to a super-sophisticated computer simulation/game (I was making particular reference to the observations made by Alex Shane last week in The Bridge Inn). As we started discussing this a new track was selected on the ARCHOS. It was track 4 of Sigur Rós ' album () (that is not a misprint by the way. That is the title of the album - and the tracks have no names either). Unofficially this track is called "Njósnavélin"which means "Spy Machine" in Icelandic

A split second before it began playing I absolutely knew what the next track would be ... and I knew why.
This particular track is the one that is played as the soundtrack of the final sequence of Vanilla Sky (when the Tom Cruise character David Aames realises that he is living in an illusion and chooses to jump off the top of a skyscraper).

The symbolism was not lost in me. Here was yet again a message to show me that this is my self-created phaneron - and just like what happens with David Aames it uses imagery from my own memory databanks to populate my world and give subtle nudges as to the real nature of reality.

Now what is really weird is that I have blogged many times before about this particular scene in that movie (e.g. but not only that - in that blog I also placed a link to the actual sequence with the Sigur Rós song playing in the background.

And what does ( ) mean? Could it be a symbol of my oft used quotation of Emile Goncourt that life is "a nothing between two epileptic seizures"!
This is all Maya!!!!

The "Inner Self Helper" - aka "The Daemon"?

When I completed the writing the first version of ITLAD back in 2000 I contacted Near-Death researcher Dr. Phyllis Atwater. Much to my surprise and delight Phyllis suggested that I send her a full copy of the book.

A few weeks later I received an email from Phyllis praising the book, saying that my theory and writing style reminded her of Dr.Melvin Morse, a founding father of NDE research. However she suggested that I had written it for myself rather than for a potential audience. She suggested that I go away and “re-write it for your readers”. I subsequently took this advice and the rest is, as they say, history.

However it is rather ironic that in the subsequent versions of ITLAD, and indeed the published version that you all know and love, the sections on Dr. Atwater’s research never made it through the process. However this does not mean that her work was invalid with regard to CTF – on the contrary. I was reading through the original version today and I came across the following section that is hugely supportive of my now, much refined, Daemon-Eidolon Dyad.

‘Dr. Atwater, stimulated by experiences of her own, has spent many years researching the theory of reincarnation and practiced as a professional hypnotherapist for six years. During this time she specialised in past life regressions as described earlier. However encounters with our ‘hidden entity’ contributed to her decision to close her practice.

After facilitating many past-life recollections she came to the conclusion that the significance of these memories was not what they literally described but what they said about the individual experiencer. As she writes “Regression sessions serve only one purpose, I came to realise, and that is to assist the client in gaining detachment and perspective.” However this was only a contributory factor because:

“Then I happened upon the human soul. It was most unusual how that occurred. The soul just ‘popped in’ and took over a session one day, surprising me and changing all the ‘rules’ I thought had applied to hypnosis.”

In my terminology the Daemon is simply the higher self, the all knowing, and immortal element of human consciousness. As such Dr Atwater choice of the term ‘soul’ is totally equivalent. For her this being exists outside of not only normal perception but also is in no way related to ‘personalities’ encountered in past-life recalls:

“After this first encounter I discovered that the soul, anyone’s soul, is unlike any individual or personality type supposed incarnation. It is unique unto itself. I came to recognise the soul as an objective and loving source of limitless knowledge. The room temperature would feel warmer when it emerged during a session and the client would seem to glow. Advice would be given either for the prostrate client, for me, or another not present. The soul never limited itself or played favourites. Sometimes discourses would issue forth on life and its purpose- gentle, effective discourses that seemed somehow awesome and sacred.”

Indeed as she rightly points out psychiatry now has a term for this personality behind the personalities. Known by the name of the ‘Inner Self Helper’ or ISH this being has the interests of its host personality as a priority and in this capacity assists and guides the therapist to rid its ‘lower self’ of multiple personalities. As Dr Atwater perceptively says “The ISH seemed to be the central organising core of the individual’s essence.’

I am now keen to discuss this ISH with my new friends, the Australian psychiatrists, and the rest of you on this Blogsite. Is this “Inner Self Helper” something that you have experienced?

(The two quotations are taken from P.M.H. Atwater – Beyond The Light (Thorson – 1994). Pages 117 & 118).

If you are interested in Dr. Atwater and her work check out her website at

Radiology Picture of the Day

Very interesting...

Radiology Picture of the Day

The brain section is fascinating!

Of course, the image provided here is a tribute to Tony...

Tuesday 13 May 2008


Read this about 2 weeks ago and forgot to post it, really interesting stuff

SKYPE Conferencing

I am keen to use as many tools of communication as possible. As such it would be very useful to use SKYPE as an alternative method. I am simply amazed as to how effective this is - and its totally free! The full software can be downloaded onto your PC via

I note that it has conference facilities as well as a method by which groups can be set up. As we are so geographically spread this seems a really good tool.

I have now set myself up with a webcam and microphone. I was in contact yesterday with fellow writer Bill Murtha who is around 300 miles from my home here on Wirral. It was amazing not just chatting but seeing each other as well - and all for free!!!

I am very aware of security on this. As this is a public blog I do not wish us to post our individual SKYPE addresses. As such what I suggest is that we swop them via personal emails. In this way these stay within the group.

If you are willing to swop SKYPE details with me please do so via my blog email address of

Indeed I will be avaialable for a chat for the next hour or so (1600 UK time on 13th May)

money v/s relationships!!!!!!

I grew up with my parents telling me that money is NOT important but relationships are!.....and i lived and learnt that my parents were right...i understood that life is so beautiful.....every moment is a gift....
i lost my mom and my father remarried.......its now been 19 my father feels that money is the most important thing in this world(maybe life gave him a raw deal. he is 68 years old now..)...but my question is...
Does a human being`s perception become sharper as he ages?
doesn`t life teach you to be sublime?

God's Timeshare

Imagine you could live your life then, after death, your soul could hop in a Tardis and go back in time to be reborn as someone else - a completely different set of memories, feelings, desires, aspirations, and temperament (for all we'd like to believe these things are unique to each of us, there is ample evidence that they can be changed by physical injury suggesting a physical basis for these things). You might even return as a person you knew in you previous life.

You would simply be someone else, wouldn't you? Now imagine that has happened as many times as there are people. That would allow for the existence of just one consciousness. We may all be timeshares on God's mainframe. We might even be God slummin' it!

This does not necessarily cut across CTF - if this happens then we do return as ourselves eventually, and quite probably with the Daemon unique to us. But don't take too much notice of me - I spend too much time writing multi-tasking software so my perspective is suspect!

Post Seizure event

For those who live with a seizure/epilepsy condition, you will know that it is common to fall into a deep sleep immediately following a Tonic Clonic fit. My daughter used to do this every time. She would sleep for a good hour or so.

My 23 year old son, who has also had grand mals, is a bit more special in that his day to day life seems to be spent, some would say, in his 'right brain' and he quite visibly shares his day to day life with his daemon. This manifests a bit like a kind of Jekyll and Hyde - mostly he is gentle and kind and polite but sometimes, for no obvious reason, he will be Hyde... an angry, aggressive and distracted individual from another world, talking at people who we do not see. (Add to this the autism condition.)

Well, what is this leading to, I hear you ask? The connection is that he had a grand mal seizure last week.. his first for nearly 3 years. Yes, you probably understand our initial emotion of great disappointment that this should happen when we were becoming optimistic of reducing his medication.

Once his shaking stopped, his body reacted the way we are used to... he clearly wanted to fall into a deep sleep... BUT.. he did not. Something in him fought it off. So we then witnessed behaviour that I believe few will have seen. It was astonishing - so much so that once he was sitting down, safely, we started filming him so that we could share it with his psychologist.

I'm sorry that I cannot show his movie to the world, but I can tell you that for a good hour we watched a person whose left, 'dominant' brain seemed to have switched off, but whose body was being driven by something else. His language seemed like English but he had a lot of new words and concepts, and 'Hyde' was very prominent. And as he started to 'come out of it', the extreme personality gave way to a lot of fast 'switching', mumbling and confusion.

I have yet to decide for myself if what we saw was anything unusual, maybe connected to Eidolons and Daemons - or was it just a well documented, normal (as opposed to paranormal) response? Ed

Parallel Worlds

Anyone happen to watch the BBC programme about the many TV shows and films that have portayed parallel worlds? They moved on from talking about Star Trek and Dr Who into films that are based around quantum physics, such as Sliding Doors and the notion of multiple worlds.
As I watched it I was thinking to myself how the producers of the show might have further benefited from having read ITLAD or maybe even just joining in the BLOG - which gets far more profound than they were able to manage.
Nevertheless, a good show, I thought. (Actually, it's just another fine example of how clever i am at creating my own illusions.)

Monday 12 May 2008


ive always wondered about trust and how much is too much.....!
there are some people with whom u can trust your life with.....( hopefully your life is precious to u!)
for me building trust is of utmost importance....i think its trust that takes a relationship forward.....without trust in your self and the other im sure the relationship will surely fail...
but,can we measure trust?

RANZCP Conference, Melbourne

Slowly but surely CTF and ITLAD are becoming more and more known and, even better, accepted by a wider audience. I have received an email from two psychiatrists based in Australia - Dr Mahendra Perera and Dr Gayan Padmasekera. Both have read the book and are both fascinated and intrigued by its implications. However they have now given me the ultimate recognition by asking for my active involvement in the writing of a clinical handbook on Near-Death Experience. It is their intention to write a primer on the NDE phenomenon for clinicians in medical and health environments. They not only request that I write a chapter but also that I become a member of the editorial team of the book. I am very honoured.

Indeed both Mahendra and Gayan will be presenting a symposium on NDE at the forthcoming RANZCP (The Royal Australian & New Zealand College of Psychaitrists) and plan to discuss the implications of itlad and CTF with the delegates. Honour indeed.

To check this out please follow this hyperlink:

What is rather frustrating about this is that as far as I am aware ITLAD is yet to be published in Australia. However it is available in New Zealand.

Flower and Tree of Life

Here is a fascinating website that illustrates that the "Flower of Life" image is common to most cultures and religions. Since you have been talking about the tree of life I thought you might be interested in this:

Hyperthymesty (3)

Jill Price aka "A.J." talks.

A follow up on Tony's posts of April 1st.